The title in this film comes from a line where a Japanese doctor says he cannot use a shotgun and will kill his enemies in "Japanese style," to which our overly-muscled hero with flowing locks replies while holding a pistol that he'll do his killing in "American style." Nice. Robert Z'Dar is a criminal named … Continue reading Killing American Style (1990)
Yeah, a Spaghetti Western. I know how much you guys love Spaghetti Westerns, which is to say, not at all. Too bad, this one is worth watching. It's got cannibalism, rape, blood, and violence. It's also got Lucio Fulci's name there on the poster. You owe it to yourself to watch it now. Stubby Preston … Continue reading Four of the Apocalypse (1975)
Yep, it's a movie about beautiful, scantily-clad women stuck behind bars in a place run by sadists and supplied by two horny dudes who really need to find a better line of work. Not for their sake, for the prisoners. Collier is thrown into a prison in an unnamed tropical country for murder, where she … Continue reading The Big Doll House (1971)
Deathstalker is basically if you imagined the Conan the Barbarian movie with Arnold Schwarzenegger through the prism of the Gor universe, only with worse editing. It consists of two things: fights and rapes. Also there is some magic thrown in there and a decent ogre outfit, but I don't want to distract from this movie … Continue reading Deathstalker (1983)
Take a bunch of mad scientist vampires, a rural hospital, a bunch of horny college students, a lake, two mechanics as dumb as they are evil, and a whole bunch of sex, and you get Evils of the Night, a movie that features many spectacular actors and that I guarantee they never put on their … Continue reading Evils of the Night (1985)
The early 1970s was a wild time. American confidence in the military was hugely eroded thanks to the war in Vietnam. Our opinion of government had been shot to shit by years of political failure regarding the war, the Cold War, and Nixon's illegitimate reelection tactics. The Civil Rights movement had ended in perceived victory … Continue reading The Crazies (1973)
Man, look at that poster art. It's like if you mixed the poster for Star Trek V: The Final Frontier with Masters of the Universe. That's got to be good, right? Oh, who am I kidding? The answer is most definitely no. Abraxas, Guardian of the Universe is not a good movie, but it is … Continue reading Abraxas, Guardian of the Universe (1990)
Man, fish-men love the ladies. Have you ever wanted to see a bunch of aquatic horrors gore and claw men to death and then forcibly strip and sexually assault women? If so, you should think about talking to someone, but that's what this movie is about, so I've got something for you! Basically a small … Continue reading Humanoids from the Deep (1980)
Ever wonder what a sword-and-sandal reboot of Black Mama White Mama would look like if it were a pseudo-sequel to Spartacus? No? Well, too bad, because now we're gonna talk about The Arena, a film where Americans and Italians show an incredibly attractive black woman from Africa and an incredibly attractive white woman from France … Continue reading The Arena (1974)
It's the 1970s. The American urban sprawl is a crime-filled wasteland of drugs and violence. Gangs openly walk the streets, hunting for victims in the parks, on the subway, and even in the grocery store. What's a guy to do? Why, get a gun and go to town, of course. Death Wish is a weird … Continue reading Death Wish (1974)
