If there is one thing horror movies have taught me (and there are many, many things horror movies have taught me), it's to never be the last person inside anywhere. It's not necessarily about being the first person out, but definitely do enough cardio and be willing to trip folks so you're not the last. … Continue reading Last Shift (2014)
Groundhog Day. We have a strange love affair with this movie. We compare other movies to it, such as Happy Death Day being Groundhog Day as a slasher, Edge of Tomorrow being Groundhog Day an alien invasion war movie, Boss Level as a pure action take on Groundhog Day, and so on. It isn't our … Continue reading The Endless (2017)
This was supposed to be a porno, but somewhere along the way, the director decided it should become a straight up horror movie. Yet the scariest thing about it is that the 1970s were full of bad taste. I'd rather it had stayed porn. A cult worshiping a doctor who might somehow be related to … Continue reading Legacy of Satan (1974)
This is also known as Clive Barker's Lord of Illusions, because Clive Barker likes making sure his name is on things. Good old Clive Barker. He gave us Hellraiser, Nightbreed, Candyman, and a whole bunch of other movies not really worth remembering compared to all of his writing, video games, art, action figure line...I think … Continue reading Lord of Illusions (1995)
If you're wondering if this movie is as bad as that poster makes it seem...yes. Yes, it is. In the 1980s, an evil cult run by an immortal Satanist seeks a magic jewel that contains immense power from an undreamed of age. They also like to hold private parties for teams of buxom women to … Continue reading The Lost Empire (1984)
Straight out of Ghana comes yet another action packed masterpiece: Ananse! Before we go any further, I should stress that there are roughly 80 languages spoken in Ghana, 11 of which are sponsored by the government. While English is one of these, this movie is not in English, and I don't speak any of the … Continue reading Ananse (2010)
Take a 1970s biker film. That's a good place to start. Mix in some poorly handled New Age mumbo jumbo, some hardcore Satanism, and a pinch of gore, then for bonus effect use the same werewolf effects we've been seeing since the 1940s, and you've got Werewolves on Wheels, a film that is just as … Continue reading Werewolves on Wheels (1971)
The tagline for this should be, "It blows." In the 1930s, somewhere in rural America-totally-not-the-English-moors, a demon possesses a dude and makes him murder his wife. In present day rural America-totally-not-the-English-moors, the dead folks' grandson shows up at a run down gas station with his girlfriend, who promptly shows him her butt. Then his friends … Continue reading Demon Wind (1990)
Movie Reviews by a Mook 