Ever wonder what twisted thoughts lurk in the darkest corners of Canada? If you figured it included Saturday morning Sentai shows, troubling family dynamics, and aliens potentially questioning their sexuality, then you know a lot more about Canada than I do. And you'd also somehow be right, which just makes this weirder. After deftly crushing … Continue reading Psycho Goreman (2021)
It is the future. Solar flares have led to environmental catastrophe. A once proud America is now a mixture of totalitarian states, gang territories, and warlord fiefdoms. With everyone scrounging for the scraps, who are the few good people left to rely on? A woman with a bare face runs through darkened streets and alleys, … Continue reading Karate Cop (1991)
Whoa, whoa, whoa, hold up. This movie is still in theaters. Do you feel comfortable with me talking about a movie that you could go see on the big screen right now? Because too bad, I'm doing it. Young couple Kyle and Tori Breyer have trouble conceiving in 2006, when all of a sudden, a … Continue reading Brightburn (2019)
As in this girl has special powers due to how she came to be, not that she's giving out presents or anything. Though admittedly, it would be kinda nice to get a present right now. I mean, who doesn't love free stuff? In the very near future, the world sucks. Athlete's Foot has basically evolved … Continue reading The Girl with All the Gifts (2016)
Zombie horror movies. I couldn't tell you how many of them I've seen over the years by now. There just doesn't seem like much new that these kinds of films can give us, and then, BAM! Out of nowhere, you suddenly find one that makes the subgenre interesting, if not necessarily relevant. It's weird how … Continue reading Train to Busan (2016)
Man, look at that poster art. It's like if you mixed the poster for Star Trek V: The Final Frontier with Masters of the Universe. That's got to be good, right? Oh, who am I kidding? The answer is most definitely no. Abraxas, Guardian of the Universe is not a good movie, but it is … Continue reading Abraxas, Guardian of the Universe (1990)
Women do, in fact, rule. Sometimes this movie is called Phoenix the Warrior. Either way, it's a post-apocalyptic film about dirty women in what amounts to fur bikinis and bondage gear getting into badly choreographed fights and gun battles over the only man alive. Because even in a world populated only by women, we still … Continue reading She-Wolves of the Wasteland (1988)
It's always nice to see the Hammer name on something, and here it is. Plus, it's on a gothic horror film, so it's like Hammer was coming full circle and trying their hand once more at the kinds of films that made them famous. Daniel Radcliffe is a widower and lawyer who is trying to … Continue reading The Woman in Black (2012)
Yes, talking about Troll 2 feels like a cop out, because it's become just so infamous at this point. If you haven't heard of it, I'm greatly surprised. Odds are most cult film fans are familiar with much of it, and even a layperson has encountered it at some point through Internet memes and coming … Continue reading Troll 2 (1990)
It's Halloween, the most wonderful time of the year. A 9-year-old boy named Dougie who hasn't yet figured out his incest fetish is happily awaiting the arrival of his hot college coed sister. He's also addicted to a game made with what was at the time Macromedia Flash that involves a kid helping torture, maim, … Continue reading Satan’s Little Helper (2004)
Movie Reviews by a Mook 