I watch a lot of movies with outrageous posters, but that is actually Nicole Eggert's costume in the film, down to the cowcatcher face mask she sports when kicking butt. Why does she wear a train grill as a mouth guard? I have no idea. It's explained to be some kind of two-way radio, but … Continue reading The Demolitionist (1995)
A tower. A ridiculously massive sniper rifle. A couple of folks with a history who dislike and yet obviously lust after each other. A couple of unusual security guards. A stoic Dolph Lundgren. Silent Trigger is the kind of borderline action thriller that is cheap, occasionally sleazy, and somehow tries to be philosophical and end … Continue reading Silent Trigger (1996)
Made-for-TV misadventures, is there anything grander? Don't answer that, we both know there isn't. Legion is another made-for-tv movie, a 1998 science fiction horror picture that borrows more than a little from the likes of Aliens, Predator, and The Dirty Dozen. It's a story of prisoner soldiers in wartime turning on each other to confront … Continue reading Legion (1998)
It is the future. Solar flares have led to environmental catastrophe. A once proud America is now a mixture of totalitarian states, gang territories, and warlord fiefdoms. With everyone scrounging for the scraps, who are the few good people left to rely on? A woman with a bare face runs through darkened streets and alleys, … Continue reading Karate Cop (1991)
At the end of the last millennium, Dolph Lundgren acted in an action supernatural horror movie about the oncoming apocalypse. Surprisingly, this was done in 1998, the year before Arnold Schwarzenegger would release his own action supernatural horror movie End of Days. Of course, there are some similarities between the two, both involving fighting the forces … Continue reading The Minion (1998)
The title in this film comes from a line where a Japanese doctor says he cannot use a shotgun and will kill his enemies in "Japanese style," to which our overly-muscled hero with flowing locks replies while holding a pistol that he'll do his killing in "American style." Nice. Robert Z'Dar is a criminal named … Continue reading Killing American Style (1990)
Serious question: why does the super-powerful Mandroid need breathing tubes? It doesn't breathe. What is the point of those tubes? Eastern Europe, 1993. The Cold War has ended, and tons of technology and military hardware is now up for grabs to the highest bidder. Dr. Karl Zimmer happens to be a scientist with a new … Continue reading Mandroid (1993)
Ah, the 1990s, when the mullets and male ponytails of the 1980s had transitioned to the bad guys, along with designer suits featuring shoulder pads. Now all the villains are massive body builders with leather do-rags, and they run in pricey restaurants and upscale hotels. It was truly a magical time, where you could spot … Continue reading Night Hunter (1996)
Man, look at that poster art. It's like if you mixed the poster for Star Trek V: The Final Frontier with Masters of the Universe. That's got to be good, right? Oh, who am I kidding? The answer is most definitely no. Abraxas, Guardian of the Universe is not a good movie, but it is … Continue reading Abraxas, Guardian of the Universe (1990)
This is also known as Clive Barker's Lord of Illusions, because Clive Barker likes making sure his name is on things. Good old Clive Barker. He gave us Hellraiser, Nightbreed, Candyman, and a whole bunch of other movies not really worth remembering compared to all of his writing, video games, art, action figure line...I think … Continue reading Lord of Illusions (1995)
