A college student named Billy Batson dies in a traffic accident. His uncle's ghost shows up to take him to Heaven, but he's way more preoccupied with getting laid, so he tries to go back to wooing the lady he couldn't make it with. Hijinks ensue. That's the movie, folks. It's over, go home. If … Continue reading School Spirit (1985)
While watching Ghoulies IV, I had a mental breakthrough: I believe I hate myself. Ghoulies IV is not a good movie. It's not even a good Ghoulies movie, and that's an incredibly low bar. The budget on this was so tiny, they couldn't even afford to bring back the Ghoulies puppets from previous films; the … Continue reading Ghoulies IV (1994)
Thank God for Troma. Monster in the Closet is a spoof on 1950s monster movies and their extreme straitlaced paranoia. A monster comes out of closets and attacks residents in a small California community a little north of San Francisco. A young man who desperately wants to become a journalist gets the story as a … Continue reading Monster in the Closet (1986)
Hey, two college horror movies back to back. Now how do you like that? It's weird how themes come up sometimes. They're also both terrible, which doesn't really make things any better. I can tell you right now, the title of this movie pretty much tells you what to expect, first in that the premise … Continue reading Ghoulies III: Ghoulies Go to College (1991)
A serial killer named Jack Frost is captured accidentally by a small town sheriff. He swears revenge before being sent off to be executed, but a tragic traffic accident results in his being exposed to a chemical which causes his body to meld with snow. As a result, he becomes a killer snowman, and he … Continue reading Jack Frost (1997)
It's Halloween, the most wonderful time of the year. A 9-year-old boy named Dougie who hasn't yet figured out his incest fetish is happily awaiting the arrival of his hot college coed sister. He's also addicted to a game made with what was at the time Macromedia Flash that involves a kid helping torture, maim, … Continue reading Satan’s Little Helper (2004)
The star of Gremlins ends up having to face off against the forces of evil in a wax museum, where all of the exhibits are actually parallel dimensions trying to get human sacrifices so that the eighteen most evil creatures in history can then be revived to walk the earth. For the most part they're … Continue reading Waxwork (1988)
The sequel to Ghoulies takes place in a carnival, though this time the actual ghoulies feel like way more of the focus instead of some undead Satanist magic crap. As a result, I ended up liking this movie a lot more than the original. The little demons run amok in a funhouse, they kill a … Continue reading Ghoulies II (1988)
Ok, so Treat Williams and Joe Piscopo are cops, right? As in buddy cops, right? As in partners. And they have to solve a string of jewelry heists where the robbers take way too many bullets to drop, right? Ok, yeah, and then during an investigation at a pharmaceuticals company, Treat Williams gets killed, ok? … Continue reading Dead Heat (1988)
Ah, comedy horror. This movie is terrible, but it's ridiculously, hilariously terrible. I love C.H.U.D. 2. I know I have bad taste. I don't care. C.H.U.D. 2 is hilariously awful and awfully hilarious. It's incredibly stupid, it knows it, and it runs with it. Laugh at the CHUDs behavior. Thrill to its theme song, which … Continue reading C.H.U.D. II: Bud the C.H.U.D. (1989)
Movie Reviews by a Mook 